Sunday, March 8, 2009

Just Being There...!

Ever have one of those days...?

Do you sometimes get the feeling that things are closing in a bit? Ever just wish that folks, however well intentioned, would just leave you alone for a while? Ever get really worried about all the negativity roaming around the Internet and the airways?

Of course...we all have those days. Just a part of life, I guess. I know there are times that I would just love to get a cup of coffee, go sit on the porch and watch nature do her thing...all without the background noises and confusion of living in the city.

However, folks living in the country can get overwhelmed as well! Too many chores that just need to be done as soon as possible, animals that need to be tended to, family to be fed and cared for, cleaning that just won't do itself no matter how much you wish it would!

This may sound a little crazy, but I think the human being has a sort of internal clock, a warning system, if you will...that kicks in from time to time and lets us know that we need to back off from things a bit. Tells us we need to slow down some and enjoy a little peace and quiet.

I also feel that when you finally hit that zone, when you put yourself in that state of mind...something about the internal radar sends out a signal to others to give you some space. There are times when nothing that anyone can say or do will be enough to pull you out of that zone peacefully. Any attempt to do that will be met with a bad reaction most of the time. Most all of us need that time inside ourselves, that moment of aloneness, of solitude...

Let me make a suggestion here. If you run across someone lost in that zone, someone who has managed to get into the quiet spot inside, someone entertaining some hidden and private thoughts...just don't say anything. Don't ask them "what's wrong?" or ask "can I do anything?"

Just let them be where they are at for now. Instead of talking to them and maybe disturbing the inner reflection, just approach them quietly and maybe place your hand gently on their arm or shoulder. That simple act alone, with nothing being said, can go a lot farther to letting them know that they are not alone...than any words could ever do. Touching someone gently lets them know you are there for them, available if they need you, and most of all lets them know that you do understand their frame of mind.

A gentle touch, a quick little smile, and the room to be alone with our thoughts are sometimes all that we need to recharge our batteries a bit. Anyway, that's what I think, for what it's worth.

To me, the most important part of friendship is the being there...and believe it or not, that gentle touch can say a lot!

Now, what do you say to a fresh cup of coffee, my friend?

19 comments:

Grandpa Eddie said...

Sometimes a touch is all that's needed.

Rod said...

Excellent post Jim
Kind of in that spot myself right now.
Keep up the good work!

Rod

HermitJim said...

Hey Eddie...I couldn't agree with you more about that!

Thanks for coming by...


Hey Rod...we all go there from time to time. Just human nature, I guess...

Thanks for the visit, my friend!

Anonymous said...

coffee?,,yes, please....conversations good,,,

HermitJim said...

Hey Erik...coffee coming up! Never let the pot go empty here at the Hermit's...

Thanks for stopping by, my friend!

Anonymous said...

Damn Jim;
Just what I was thinking this morning. You read minds to?

HermitJim said...

Hey Tony...you know what they say about "great minds thinking alike"...

Maybe it's just a little wisdom tempered with age...who knows?

Thanks for the visit, my friend!

Bullseye said...

Great post my friend that I wish many people in my life could read. Peace and quite are two of my favorite friends, wish I could spend more time with them.....

HermitJim said...

Hey Bullseye...know what you mean, my friend. Just because I'm retired, many seem to think that means I'm always available for the least little thing.

Wonder what part of "hermit" they don't understand?

Thanks for the visit today!

Anonymous said...

Great post my friend --------------
YeOldFurt

Ken said...

...hey,that sounds like one of my fishin'trips...occasionaly,i go fishin',and don't want to catch any fish,i use this time for one of my 'lost in thought' moments...

...good insight Brother,nothin' better than a thermos of coffee,and some silence...

HermitJim said...

Hey Furt...glad you like it...and glad you came by today!


Hey Ken...I hear ya on that, my brother! Sometimes fishing is plenty good, just in being by the water!

Cleans the mind and calms the soul...that's what it's all about!

Thjanks for dropping in today!

Lydia said...

Great advice Jim, as always.

I get this way quite a bit. Just need to be left alone as you've written. Maybe for reflection, maybe solitude, maybe just...nothing at all.

One of the kindest things I remember my best friend doing, is coming over right when hearing me sobbing hysterically over the phone after learning my dad had lung cancer. She was busy with her family but dropped everything, came over, gave me a huge hug and just sat next me. She let me lean on her shoulder and sat there quietly for a really long time. She knew I just needed this quietness.

I still remember it as the one thing that got me through that initial shock, it helped me absorb what was going on.

Thanks for another good post.
:)
lydia

HermitJim said...

Hey Lydia...that's what friend do best...just offer support by being there. Knowing that someone is available if you do wanty to talk, or sound off, or rant a bit is ssometimes all it takes.

Hey, I appreciate you coming by...

Thomas Miller said...

Jim, since I adopted this RV lifestyle, the times you described have become invaluable. I was a city boy. Busy all the time. Married with kids. Go-go-go. Now, it's just me and this ol' RV (and 2 killer kats).

Tonight, for example, 3rd glass of wine. Mid 60's at 10P. Cool breeze blowing through. Coyotes howling in the trees. I'm sitting here thinking..."this is awesome!"

Thanks for the post.

HermitJim said...

Hey Man...you are certainly in tune to what I was talking about. Sometimes we get so caught up in the doing and the getting...we loose track of the enjoying!

When we can make ourselves slow down and tune in a bit to all the simple pleasures brought to us by nature...we are only the better for it. At least, that's the way that I see it...

I really appreciate you taking ther time to drop by...

Cygnus MacLlyr said...

[Salutes, Bows Respectfully, and Leaves...]

blondie said...

Good Post Jim,
Yep, we all need to go there from time to time.
Enjoy your time off :)
blondie

HermitJim said...

Hey Blondie...good to see ya again.All of us nered a little alone time now and then. It's hard to convey that thought to others sometimes...

Thanks for stopping in...